Have you ever heard, “It’s a blessing in disguise”?
Well, sometimes that blessing can be “too good to be true”.
I am certain there are readers who have not read my previous posts, but I will briefly recapitulate my story:
I was born a Christian, and that has been one of the greatest blessings but an impediment in my development. Although I am bilingual, it is easier for me to stay focused and truly understand when I listen to sermons in English… but because I have been attending services with my parents in a Korean church, I found myself daydreaming during sermons. Naturally, when I came to college, I joined a fellowship to praise God. After a year of getting closer to God, I had to take a year off for personal reason. I questioned God. I felt that He was pushing me away when I have begun to get to know Him better. During a year of absence from school, God told me that He just wanted to spend 1 on 1 time with me. He wanted to teach me that I do not need to depend on others to be closer to Him, but on Him alone.
However, when I came back to school, I pushed God away. I did my worst academically and spiritually. I just couldn’t overcome academic challenges, so I kept pushing God down my priorities so that I could focus on school. That obviously did not go well. Fortunately for me, I found Jesus in my life again. This semester, I joined a ministry that could help me set my eyes upon God. I was proud and felt loved by His sons and daughters. My joining the ministry seemed like a sign that God has not let go of me… until people have expressed their concerns for me (I do not want to go too much in detail about the ministry for its privacy). I sought out God’s help and He answered. I was able to speak to different pastors and leaders of fellowships to set my eyes on TRUTH.
Just when I thought God has placed me in a right place to grow, He placed me in a place where I can seek out the truth. I think He wanted to weed out the worst while I was in the slump so that I do not fall into another slump after climbing back out of the hole. Because of those experiences and struggles God has given me, I am so willing to seek out for Him. I love my Abba and trust that He will continue to guide me.
As always, I do not know how to finish my post, but I would love to share my experiences with readers who are truly interested, so please feel free to ask me via e-mail. Also, what are you giving up for lent?